“For David says concerning him, “‘I saw the Lord always before me, for he is at my right hand that I may not be shaken; therefore my heart was glad, and my tongue rejoiced; my flesh also will dwell in hope. For you will not abandon my soul to Hades, or let your Holy One see corruption. You have made known to me the paths of life; you will make me full of gladness with your presence.”” Acts 2:25-28 ESV
With a litter under 4 weeks remaining, the end of this wonderful missional experience is starting to loom over me. As I continue with my week-by-week ministry, striving to stay focused on actively working for his glory, my heart and thoughts have started to shift to what home will be like once I return. What has changed? How can I prepare for this re-entry into a world that was once my home, while also staying connected to the work God is doing currently in me? As I raise these questions and ponder over them, in many ways I still have not found my answers. But as I seek God and reflect on the fruit he has sown in me and through me this year I know one thing is certain. God is in control, and I will rejoice in who he is and what he has done and will continue to do in me and through me.
If I could give you one phrase to sum up my past two weeks of ministry, that phrase would without a doubt be “going with the flow.” Being someone that loves structure and actively thrives in those settings, it has been extremely difficult to adjust to the fluidness of the work we are doing now. But with uncertainty and weakness comes the demand to once again trust that God is in control. And, as I jumped headfirst into my first week of this short deployment, God being in control was something I found myself clinging to desperately. As I found myself preaching 6 sermons in six days, visiting and encouraging people in their small wooden homes, and praying for the diseased and dying to experience salvation from their broken lives and bodies. However, while I deeply felt a need to rest in the word and Christ’s assured peace through these strenuous circumstances, I struggled to get into a rhythm of daily time with God. I felt like I was breathing out a lot spiritually, pouring out exaltation and challenging others in their faith, while not seeking the pouring in that my soul so desperately needed. But the spirit through my weakness showed Christ’s strength. As I preached each sermon and prayed extremely bold prayers, I was blessed to see the way God has taught me to lean on him and watch as he speaks through me. I reflected back on my first sermons in the Philippines, full of anxiousness and struggles with pride, and praised God in my heart for the ways he has grown and humbled me this year. The lord carried me through and worked in me in ways I could not have worked on my own. How awesome is our God! As I’m typing this out, I love the joy and gratitude that fills my heart as I unpack my thoughts and feelings of how God’s glory is working around me. The Lord is so good to his children, and he has been so so good to me. And just like that the first week was over and the second week began. We headed out from our small village church near the ocean to the mountain orphanage and God’s prepared work for us there. And again, God was in control. While there was less speaking and spiritual teaching to be done, there was a great need for Christ’s love to be lived out and shown to these children. Day by day, learning from the week before, I fought to find time with God in the morning. And as I sought him, I was blessed to see Christ encourage my heart through the week. Though the ministry overall felt heavy, the spirit filled my heart with joy and selfless love for the kids and helped me to live that out daily. While most of our time was spent with the kids and the activities scheduled with them, we also were able to share the gospel multiple times as we went out for EV. As we shared the gospel, we actively encouraged believers while also challenging “Christians” in their faith being one that is born again. One thing that has somewhat caught me off guard, though I knew this was how it was going to be, is the majority belief of these people being Christian. I’ve had to adapt to sharing the gospel in a different way and lean into the spirits prompting on challenging believers in their salvation being in Jesus and not in their identity of being a cultural Christian overall. God has continued to humble me, but also shown me the importance of trusting God’s sovereignty in the work. Many times, after sharing and hearing their confession of faith, it is hard to tell where they truly stand with God. But this I know. Jesus is in control, and as I share obediently with them and encourage them, I hold with certainty that the spirit is working in them to challenge and draw them closer to himself. As we prepare for our final sprint of ministry heading to a more radically religious area this week, I continue to hold on to the assurance of Christ’s sovereignty. His plans for me and for those around me or so much greater than I am able to grasp, but in the moments where I get a glimpse of how the spirit has altered my path and brought me to where I am now, I stand in awe at how amazing my God is.
While these two weeks have naturally flown by, they’ve also been filled to the brim with fun moments and times to celebrate God’s beautiful creation! Some of the moments were;
-Sharing the gospel with our taxi driver on the way to the airport
-Sweet Goodbyes and Chai Tea Latte’s
-Beautiful Sunsets and getting to know our translators
-Bible studies and stories with our village kids
-Mornings in the creek
-Emotional rollercoaster of a funeral one moment to a birthday party right after
-Encouraging church members and praying for the sick
-Beach day and very weird games + volleyball and frisbee
-Performing worship on Sunday (it was good enough)
-Trying rat and dog (thank God the dog did not taste good)
-Preaching six sermons in six days
-Boat on the lake
-Treehouse quiet times
-Bold EV in town square
-Vehicle rides and possible accidents
-Moutain views and hot pools
-Movie night with the girlz and some sweet days of rest
So yah, a lot of fun stuff. Even though my time here is short, with all the fun in store the ministry here is also still just as urgent. As I head into possibly my most challenging week of work thus far, I would really appreciate y’all’s prayer for:
- Spiritual protection for us and our translators
- Open hearts to the gospel and seeds to be planted
- Wisdom and humility in leading my teams these final days
- Intentional time and team times with God
- For a heart completely surrendered and trusting in Christ
With only 2 and a half weeks left until I’m back on American soil, I continue to trust all my worries, expectations, and plans to him. I know my struggle to readjust will be real. As I question those that have gone before me, and have first handedly experienced reverse culture shock, I begin to grasp what emotional and experiential trials I’ll have to overcome. But my prayer is, that with a prepared heart and a focus on God, I will find a way through that valley and continue on Christ’s path of life. I look forward to seeing friends, visiting camp, spending time with family, and finding time to spend with the Lord. But again, in a large sense I don’t know what to expect. However, I know that with Christ’s help all things are possible and he will bring me through. He is absolutely sovereign, and he is graciously in control. I continue to intercede persistently for y’all in the states, and I hope to see and hear of God’s goodness in your lives on my arrival home. Till then, and till next times final official blog post before I get to share with y’all in person, may God be with you, encourage you, and show you that he is in control. His plans are great, and he will never ever let you go. All praise to God!
